"They don't know what to do with [the anger]," Dr. Perry says. "Every kid I've ever worked with who's been in a gang said they joined a gang for one reason. It's not protection. It's love." "Because... they're looking outside to find out how to be and what to do," Oprah suggests, referencing sons who don't have fathers to model their behavior after. Seeking outside role models and love is not uncommon among fatherless children. "When you don't love yourself, what you tend to do is look for someone else to validate you," Dr. Perry explains.