I realize everyone is on the bandwagon on marriage equality or in the legal field it is the greater access to divorce, we are ignoring the real concerns of children. So let for many of us who are trying 'preserve marriage' whatever that may mean or be interpreted, please realize we're not doing something merely for the name or legal benefits.
We know people fear marriage, and that's a valid worry. "Too many singles hold fear of divorce
"Too many singles hold fear of divorce"
The marriage rate is at a record low in this country, and a new study from Cornell University might have found the reason why.
According to the study, two-thirds of cohabitating couples report that they fear divorce and the financial, legal, and emotional ramifications of a failed marriage. Fears such as these might prevent couples from tying the knot, particularly for younger generations who might have experienced the pain of divorce firsthand within their childhood home
Last week I went to dinner with my 80-year-old dad who was visiting me from Arizona. We were reminiscing about the days before my parents' divorce. Some of my childhood memories were actually good. Then he said to me, "Even though your mom and I got divorced, you and your sisters turned out just fine. You've all done great."
I just sat there and nodded my head. I didn't have the heart to tell him the truth. We hadn't turned out fine. Even though he knows my sisters and I also got divorced, he doesn't know the depth of the emotional pain we went through in our own marriages and divorces.
Divorce is bad, plain and simple. I am a psychologist with an excellent education and the daughter of a divorce. In school, I read everything I could get my hands on, academic and anecdotal. I talked to everyone I knew, young and old. I talked to people who stayed in unhappy marriages. I talked to people who had married multiple times. From scientific articles to Hemingway on divorce, no source was overlooked. Believe me, there is no such thing as an intelligent divorce.Children Of Divorce
Divorce is one of the most common environmental stressors experienced by children.
Our previous findings that female offspring of parental divorce and parental remarriage are more likely to report a lifetime suicide attempt than male offspring remained even after controlling for offspring depression. Findings suggest that focusing on engaging female offspring who demonstrate symptoms of depression is not sufficient to reduce suicide attempt risk in this group as many at risk individuals will remain unrecognized.
Individuals with divorced parents tended to delay marriage or not marry at all. However, among those who married, there were more divorces among the offspring of divorced parents than among offspring of parents who were still married. Offspring of divorce tended to marry other offspring of divorce. These marriages were at especially high risk of dissolution.