Monday, January 7, 2013

"Herod was afraid of babies. As we are today."

We are. We're afraid of babies. We've been taught about the perils of pregnancy for some time. The biggest peril is poverty. We don't address the poverty, we just get rid of the baby.

So when TIME came out with a cover story, that pro-choice side was the losing side many pro-lifers praised the coverage. I disagree. We may all not like abortion, but when push comes to shove, there is a lot of shoving and a lot of women choosing abortion for a myriad of reasons. Some sympathetic and despairing, others not so.

Our way of life makes having children a very difficult and inconvenient thing to do. I was fortunate for the relatively short time I working with one and two children, I had a supportive husband, school was flexible, both pairs of grandparents healthy, living, and supportive. Also I had a licensed home day care was on my street and my law office was in Lowell. If I actually had the caseload to cover the costs, I would still be working!

On my part I think there was some poor career choices, but my children were not a poor choices. Attorneys were the hardest hit with the economy, and rightfully so there are too many of us and we don't know what to do with ourselves.

How many young women had what I had though? Not many. Women may be lucky if we can get one set of grandparents to be supportive, if we're pregnant. That is if her own parents are still intact, as a couple in a non-abusive financially stable home. While I'm grateful for social programs that the fight against poverty, a woman shouldn't end up d*mned to poverty just for being a mother. Vouchers for daycare/housing/loans to obtain a skill for employment, while a necessity to address the immediate problem can not be sustained as the long-term answer.

Marriage isn't a viable option or even a part of the equation for many women to have children. Fathers end up being more a of nuisance then a help. How can we tell women to choose wisely, when the quality of the pool of men is inadequate. Marriage as a form of public policy to be at least be an option for the poor, can not be address due to legal constraints of its new definition banning references with mother/father/children as the government's interest. Feminists have rallied that men are the problem and not a part of the solution. The fact is good men are an effective weapon against poverty, so we can't cast them aside.

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